How can bold, authentic communication about money transform the world? When we are vulnerable and express our suffering to a compassionate witness, it literally rewires the brains of both people. Immense power is liberated when we dissolve shame about our money problems and connect in proud action.
If it seems that parents of kids under eighteen and adults under fifty are suffering from more stress than others, that’s because they are. And the number-one cause? Money. Don’t keep it a secret any longer, because curious inquiry into our money struggles is essential. You are not alone in this pursuit of true wealth.
Our brains are wired with special circuitry for empathy. According to Psychology Today, in June 2016 “a groundbreaking study was published which found that the ability to empathize with another person’s pain is rooted in cognitive neural processes that differ from the sensory processes used to perceive and experience one’s own pain.” This particular area of the brain does not function effectively in sociopaths and psychopaths.
I have seen the suffering caused by money fear. I have seen breakthroughs from those courageous enough to do the deep healing work and share with others their deepest most private fears around money. Such as: I can’t afford a baby; I’m ashamed at how I beg for money; or I can’t afford to leave my job. The relief and camaraderie that comes through talking money is incredible. These researchers found that friends and family within your social network literally become entwined with your own sense of self at a neural level. “With familiarity, other people become part of ourselves,” said James Coan. Invest in people who offer the encouragement that you need to shine bright.
Literally, savoring and celebrating the joys of others then amplifies your experience of well-being. In fact, our acts of kindness and generosity can indeed have big ripples that change neurological pathways.
* From American Psychological Association report in 2015 “Paying With Our Health.”